Sunday, March 13, 2011

One of my favorite Ellie stories so far

Those of you who don't tweet miss some of her most candid moments. This week she came up to me, in a bumbling-about/who-turned-off-the-lights, measured sort of way and then said, How do you like it? I'm all ready for biking:
Then last night, just before we'd remembered my year long quest to make birthdays more special (monthly dates with the kids on or about the date of their bday) and that it was Ellie's turn, she came up to me and said, I'm a Mammothiphant or an Elliemammoth:

But that's not the best part of last night. No, the best part was that Mr. O got to see what every second of every minute with Ellie in the car with you is like for me. They dropped me off at the pharmacy, while they returned a movie and when they picked me up afterwards, she started in

Mom, could I tell you a gross fing-gee about a little child who's just two?

Yes, you could tell me a gross thing about a little child who's just two. (I am at this point, already smiling in anticipation)

Well, there was this girl who was just two and she sticked both her fingers in her nose, all the way up her nose (she placed her fingers alongside each nostril for effect). So far up, her fingers got cut off from surgery and she bleeded, and she died.

Me (stifling laughter, because this is some pretty serious business): Oh? Where did you hear about this? From a friend? (I should so know better)

Oh no, it was on this show I sawed on TV called "Sad Stuff What Happens to Little People". And do you know what else was on that show? 

How did you see this show, I watch TV with you and I've never seen this show? (still straight-faced, I'm such a tease sometimes)

Well you and dad were on your date night and Spielberg was upstairs and Michelle and Nicole were playing with friends and I sawed it. Do you know what else was on that show, mom? This one's not gross, only sad. There was this baby who was just barely four....

Wait, this baby was four?

No, she was just barely BORNed and she touched a forn (thorn) and it went all the way frew her finger and her mom had to get a needle. No two needles. Her mom had to get two needles and stick them all the way under her fingernail to take that forn out and her nail comed off. Isn't that sad?

Yes, that is so sad. (I had tears, people)

At this point I busted a gut. Not to say that babies' fingernails coming off isn't a very sad thing indeed, it is, but you had to see Ellie's delivery. The entire evening went on in this vein, and at one point I looked at Mr. O and said, That little girl right there is our Retirement Plan. He agreed - we'll never get bored with her around.

Which reminds me of this:

And now if you'll excuse me, my ears need a nap.


radioactive girl said...

How wonderful that your husband got to hear it too. Such fun! I love her little imagination so much! She is just adorable.

Emily said...

I think I need a car ride with that little girl!

Kelsey @ Seattle Smith's said...

HAH nice!!!

Queen Scarlett said...

She needs to come play. My girls love telling gross/gory stories.

M-Cat said...

Oh how she and Chloee would get along. Story tellers they are! Love it