Saturday, November 14, 2009

Quiz Time: Family Matters

Final Exam!

What's your opinion on family matters? Answer these questions yes or no.

I usually celebrate my birthday with family. Yes
I try to participate in my extended family functions and gatherings. Yes
If my friend's birthday and my nephew's birthday fell on the same day, I would go to my nephew's birthday party. No
I would love to spend New Year's Eve with my family. Yes
Most of my movie outings and picnics are with family. Yes
I know all my cousins. Not exactly realistic when you have 55 of them and you're second oldest.
In case of any great news, I inform my relatives (siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.) first. Yes (re immediate family and then the word usually spreads itself)
If I have any problems, I share them and consult with my family. Yes
My family is a good support to me. Yes
I support family members in their times of need. Try to
I can name my children's best friends. Yes
I can name my partner's best friends. Yes
I know what stresses my partner is currently facing. Yes, except where work-related (because confidentiality is required).
I know the names of some of the people who have been irritating my partner lately. Yes
I can tell you some of my partner's life dreams. Yes
I can tell you about my partner's basic philosophy of life. Think so
I can list the relatives my partner likes the least. Yes
I feel that my partner knows me pretty well. Yes
When we are apart, I often think fondly of my partner. Yes
My partner really respects me. I'm not always respect worthy, but yes.
I respect my partner. Yes, I can also improve.
I notice what my partner does for me and express appreciation. Yes, about 3/4 of the time
My partner generally likes my personality. Yes, unless I am stressed.
I like my partner's personality. Yes
At the end of the day I am glad to see my partner. Yes
I listen respectfully to my dad, even when we disagree. Yes
I am beginning to understand my mom. Yes
I check up on my married siblings often. Yes - I'm not so good about checking on my brother, though
I have developed friendships with my brothers/sisters-in-law. Not as well as I should have
I occasionally call my aunts and uncles just to say hi. No
I am trying to forgive family members who have treated me poorly in the past. Don't have any that have
I know my grandmother's maiden names. Yes
I know my great-grandparent's names. Not all of them.
My kids know what my dad did for a living. Yes
I am consciously trying to strengthen my family. Yes, although I think about it more than I act.
Think about the questions you answered "no." Do they matter to you?
Done - privately.

Essay questions. Choose two.
What does your family count on you for?
If one of your relatives were to brag about you, what would they say?
What praise or acknowledgment have you gotten from your relatives that is meaningful to you?
Name five qualities of your mom or dad that you most respect or admire.
Which of those qualities are also true about you?

My family counts on me to get them places, to prepare and buy food, to launder, to straighten, to love, and to set boundaries. I'd like to get back to our family culture of four years ago, when doing all the right things felt as easy as breathing and cancer was that thing that happened to other people. Every morning started with a devotional complete with hymn-singing (albeit extremely out-of-tune hymn-singing), thought of the day, scriptures and prayer. Ahh, those were the days.

If one of my relatives were to brag about me, I think it would probably be about the way I take care of my oldest son's medical and educational needs. (I'm sad that it likely wouldn't include the way I mother all of my children as I feel I'm missing that special something other women must be born with that makes them doting creatures). But in his case, if there is a need I do what I can to see that it's filled. I take him to his appointments, have learned the ins and outs of insurance and special education law, I know what to do to calm his anxiety, I try to keep him somewhat fashionable, I snuggle with him (yes, I know he's 17) and I do it because I love him. Now if I could just do that (give that much energy and devotion, because of course I love them too) for the other four children, I'd be set.

Take your own quiz at Travelin' Oma's


Kristina P. said...

Very interesting! My family dynamics are odd, to say the least. I count my husband as my most important family member, so even when we spend the holidays alone, I am OK with it.

Travelin'Oma said...

I'm sure your other four kids are learning by watching you deal with your challenges. A wonderful mother told me, "I don't treat my children the same. I don't try to. I just do the best I can with each one." It's obvious that you do that well.

Shawn said...

What a cool quiz! I actually had about the same as you do----except for the essay was cool to read more about you---and you are an amazing Mom!!