Friday, February 26, 2010

What? It is TOO a medically-recognized disorder

So, Social Tourette's. I am a victim.

Are you familiar with this syndrome? Well, let me give you the 411 (and also ply you with random beachification photos, because technically it's still February and frankly we could all use the Vitamin D) as the young people say these days.

Over the past year, I have tried to force myself to get out and meet people. This is not so easy as you might think. You do not just show up to a blog function (ie, lunch, brunch, conference weekend), meet lovely people, and stun them with your amazing sense of humor/beauty/personality.

Well, YOU might.

I, however, show up, meet lovely people, and proceed to spout random...well random crap. Where one might normally think to respond, What an amazing experience, I'd love to hear more, (or whatever it is that normal people say) I sit in stunned silence...

Actually, stunned silence would be a whole lot better than what actually happens - my brain gets that deer-in-the-headlights look, then my mouth decides to come to the rescue. And out comes some random factoid. Something not at all related (or barely so) to the conversation at hand.

Sort of an attack of the Me Monster only with crap. The random trivia kind. Blerg! EPIC brain-mouth coordination FAIL.

I know I do this and yet have no idea how to stop it from happening. The smartest thing to do would be to stay home and take up Hermit status. Maybe grow my leg hairs out and practice braiding them. Or perfect my pig-calling skills. Or something.

But am I smart? Heck, no.

Apparently, I am determinedly anti-hermit (okay, really I'm anti pig-calling) and so I force myself out there. To those of you who've over-looked my social ineptitude and friended me anyway, I thank you. And probably, I love you. And want to have your bloggy baby.

Too much? Okay. Thanks for telling me.

Soo-eee! Heeeere piggy pig-pig.

Tell me I'm not alone in this.