Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Epic toilet trauma

**Warning: includes potty talk

I am sitting here listening to my Elliekins. She is laying on the floor, looking up at the ceiling, alternately saying in her calmest voice, "Freak and darn, freak and darn. Freak and darn." But she is also looking at me out of the corner of her eye, a mischievous grin on her face, to see my reaction.

Instead I only ask her, What does it mean when you say that?

It means my tummy hurts all the day.
****
I had the brilliant idea to have her start flushing the toilet herself again, so she could see that everything is fine and the toilet water will not come up and get her. But first, she went into panic mode and insisted she did not have to "go." Remembering what happened the last time she had such conviction (namely the employ of much towels and bleach), I counter-insisted and placed her upon the porcelain throne.

To her surprise she did have some business being there. She pooped and tried to hurry off of there. I held her on and asked her to finish. All of the sudden her eyes got really big and she started peeing. A lot. The poor girl hadn't been to the bathroom all day.

Oh! I'm watering my poop, she says.

Once she was indeed finished, I helped her put her self back together and encouraged her to flush the toilet herself. Of course I was standing next to her, but wouldn't you know it this time the water did not behave and it rose up. Much panic and shrieking ensued because the water monster was going to come up and get her (there are few times it's been harder not to laugh).

The main problem is that she does not press down hard enough on the flusher, so the bowl just fills up more rather than um, er... evacuating. Luckily, that is a problem I could fix - my flushing strength is up to par.